18 Iconic Queer Moments In Pop Culture That Taught Us More Than Any Classroom Ever Could

    From Bollywood scenes that accidentally educated our families to pop stars who made queerness feel powerful, here are the moments that taught us more than any textbook ever did.

    Arsheen Kaur Sahni
    by Arsheen Kaur Sahni

    BuzzFeed Staff

    Let’s be real—most of us didn’t learn about queerness from school. We learnt it from pop stars in glitter, movies that snuck in a gay subplot, and YouTube interviews that made people feel seen. Here’s a list of the moments that actually taught the world what it means to be queer, confident, and unapologetic.

    Queer Eye / Via giphy.com

    1. When Schitt’s Creek gave us a queer relationship without any trauma plotline.

    David discusses wine preferences with Stevie, mentioning he drinks various types: red, white, Merlot, and Chardonnay. Stevie comments on his openness
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    David and Patrick’s love story healed something in us. It was soft, cheesy, and finally happy. No tragic ending, no secret affairs, just two men falling in love over homemade knishes and awkward serenades. And let’s not forget the wine scene—where David explained his sexuality using wine labels, not labels-labels. Subtle. Brilliant. Unforgettable.


    2. When Rihanna said “who’s going to stop me?” in that Loud album era, and we believed her.

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    Every queer person has a Rihanna lyric that got them through a bad day. Rude Boy. S&M. Diamonds. It wasn’t just music. It was survival. She taught people confidence before they even knew they needed it.


    3. When Lady Gaga said “born this way” and we played it on loop in our Nokia XpressMusic.

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    The LGBTQ+ anthem that wasn’t just a bop, it was a cultural reset. Gaga gave us church, glitter, and identity. Schools didn’t give us any of that.

    4. Sushant Divgikar taking over Indian reality TV (and our hearts).

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    sushantdivgikr / Via Instagram: @https://www.instagram.com/sushantdivgikr/?hl=en

    Whether it was Bigg Boss or Sa Re Ga Ma Pa, Sushant—and later, Rani KoHEnur—gave India one of its first openly queer entertainers in the mainstream. They didn’t just bring vocals, they brought visibility, sass, and sequins. I didn’t even know genderfluidity could be that powerful until Rani walked in heels and sang in three octaves.

    5. Fashion reality TV teaching us about 'chosen family' before we knew what that meant.

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    Project Runway. ANTM. RuPaul’s Drag Race. They gave us fashion, drama, and a peek into queer friendships that looked nothing like the friend circles from school. No one taught me confidence like Miss Tyra yelling, "WE WERE ALL ROOTING FOR YOU."


    6. That Gauri Khan-produced scene in Kal Ho Naa Ho that was queerer than expected.

    A woman in traditional attire stands indoors holding a tray with a glass of juice and a bowl, appearing serious
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    When Kanta Ben kept fainting at the idea of Shah Rukh and Saif’s “relationship,” desi queers everywhere were like “wait… this is kinda validating?” Sure it was played for laughs, but this was the first time many of us even saw queerness referenced at all in a Bollywood blockbuster.

    7. Karan Johar’s autobiography admitting what Bollywood wouldn’t.

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    While he never named it outright, An Unsuitable Boy was the first time a big Bollywood director pulled back the curtain on his private life, in his own words. Karan talked about being bullied in school, growing up feeling “different,” and how people constantly speculated about his sexuality. He stopped short of using labels, but the subtext was clear. He also called out how homophobia runs deep in the industry and how Bollywood isn’t a safe space for queer folks. Queer coding? No babe, this was queer decoding.

    8. The Dostana closet scene that made many question their sexuality for the first time.

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    When John and Abhishek pretended to be a couple, we laughed. But that closet scene? That was something we hadn’t even processed yet.

    9. When Troye Sivan dropped Bloom and the queer internet exploded.

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    He was soft. He was openly gay. He was singing about it. And suddenly, Tumblr was full of flower gifs and metaphors.

    10. Ayushmann Khurrana playing a gay man in Shubh Mangal Zyada Saavdhan.

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    Say what you will about it being commercial, but for many families, this was the first time they even acknowledged the idea of gay love, without changing the channel. It wasn’t perfect, but it opened living room conversations.


    11. When Sex Education gave us queer teens with real emotions, not just tragedy tropes.

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    From Eric strutting in bold prints to Cal navigating identity on their own terms, Sex Education gave us queer characters who felt real, not written in just for drama. But it was Adam’s arc that really stood out: a bully figuring himself out, fumbling through feelings, and learning to choose honesty over shame. It wasn’t perfect. And that’s exactly why it worked. Finally, queer teens with feelings, not just plot devices.


    12. Four More Shots Please! and Umang’s coming out scene.

    Person lifting dumbbells while lying on a bench, focused on exercise. Tattoos visible on arms
    Four More Shots Please / Via imdb.com

    Say what you will about the show’s dialogue, but when Umang came out to her conservative Punjabi family, it struck a nerve, because that living room tension felt way too real. Desi bisexual panic? Finally televised.

    13. The time Manvendra Singh Gohil came out as gay royalty on Oprah.

    Two people in ornate traditional attire with sashes, possibly for a cultural or pride event, stand on a decorative structure
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    India’s first openly gay prince spoke his truth on Oprah. The level of global impact? Unmatched. The message? Queerness exists everywhere—even in palaces.


    14. Kalki Koechlin in Margarita with a Straw—queer, disabled, brown and real.

    Person seated indoors, gesturing awkwardly with hands. The caption reads "*awkward*."
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    A bisexual woman with cerebral palsy figuring out her identity? This film dared to exist outside the binary, and for once, gave a story that felt new, nuanced, and needed. This movie taught us that queerness doesn’t look one way, and that’s the point.

    15. Ek Ladki Ko Dekha Toh Aisa Laga saying the word “lesbian” out loud in a Bollywood movie.

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    It didn’t go viral, but it mattered. Sonam Kapoor played a quiet, closeted queer character with actual dignity, and that’s a rarity. Sometimes soft, awkward representation is still representation.


    16. Kapoor & Sons gave us a gay character who wasn’t the punchline.

    A man in a suit holds a drink at a bar, nodding agreeably, with the caption "SO HOT"
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    Fawad Khan playing a closeted gay man in a mainstream Bollywood family drama? That was bold. No rainbow flags, no grand speeches, just quiet heartbreak, buried identity, and the weight of trying to “keep it together.”

    17. Aligarh made us sit with the silence.

    Two men in conversation; one faces forward wearing a suit with a striped tie, looking thoughtful. The other, in a denim jacket, has his back to the camera
    Aligarh / Via imdb.com

    Based on the real-life story of Professor Siras, Aligarh wasn’t loud or flashy; it was quiet, heartbreaking, and brutally honest. Manoj Bajpayee’s performance showed us what it meant to be outed, shamed, and erased, just for existing.

    18. When Made in Heaven gave us Karan’s storyline and didn’t hold back.

    A person with a solemn expression, wearing a plain shirt, indoors
    Made in Heaven / Via imdb.com

    Arjun Mathur’s character being unapologetically gay in an Indian OTT show? Huge. The second season going deeper into queer pain, protest, and healing? Even bigger. It wasn’t just a subplot—it was a full, raw, queer arc.


    Still waiting on a school syllabus that mentions Section 377, drag history, or chosen families? Same. Until then, we’ll be right here, replaying our queer pop culture curriculum and rewriting the rules.